shaken,grieved...she lives on

during the days when i wished to have my own blog...i used to think on wht could i possibly feed it with.writing abt things that usually fascinate me or some of my own experiences thats worth sharing was what i thgt could find a place in my blog.its now over a year or so and i guess i ve done justice to my own expectations or ideas.i would ve definitely not wished to write abt an incident that has left many people arnd the world baffled.but as always circumstances forces me to.
60 hrs of anxiety,loss of many innocent lives and loss of some of our finest cops was all it took for us to realise that our county isnt safe any more and that our leaders have all made a big fool of us.....or have we??....i was just among a billion more who were glued to our tv sets watching the entire operation...with sinking hearts and praying lips.with the death toll rising it was all but clear that our leaders have failed and have failed terribly.this case might have not got the international attention it has now received if it wasnt the foreigners who were among the ones held hostage.because in India,life is cheap.its just after all a very negligible reduction to our 1 billion strong population.the politicians still have a huge herd of fools left.at this time of crisis,its natural for us to feel insecure but the important point is when will we ever have to get rid of this insecurity blanket?.our politicians could have atleast made up the post terror period interesting with the blame game and fake resignation dramas.we ve had enuf of it.
mr.politician i sincerely hope that you dont get to see your loved one putting it up with one of those terrorists who is indiscriminately firing on hundreds of innocent people and could end up his life anytime.
mr politician i also hope that you dont get to hear your telephone ringing and understand what it is to be in that span of a minute.
mr.politician i also hope that you may not get to see your son being wrapped up in the tricolor.
mr. politician i sincerely wish that your house is not flanked by politicians with the media people to insult you by paying a ransom of a lakh rupees.
you are very queer folks indeed.folks who know nothing but money.there is life outside currencies mr.politician.you are the chosen one.we have chosen you to lead us and not bleed us.and i want to tell this to u mr.politiican...no one will turn away from the major's house coz none of your sons have even 1% of the patriotism,courage and commitment that this 30 yr old great chap has shown.he has stood in the front not wondering about his life,his dreams,his family or his fav.actors movie which he mite ve planned to go that weekend.he just thought he should save many innocent lives mr.politician.he just thought he shud be there doing his job.you reward people who shoot in olympic games with the ultimate luxuries of life.and wht ve u done to take care of these men who are actually shooting terrorists who mite have thgt of shooting one of your dear ones??.mr.raj thacekray,i am sorry but i would like to tell u that it were not the marathis alone in the nsg who were fighting these terrorists but in fact "indians" or "outsiders" as you may better know.maybe you were counting the no of marathi commandos involved in the operation but we were counting the no of dead indians and offering sympathies to their loved ones.
i dont actually want to say this again.people would have told this far more eloquently that what i am equipped to.but yes...we ve had enuf.we need actions and not words.we need leaders.we need peace.with attacks likes these my hope of a developed india seems nothing more than a fairy tale to me.will my children get to enjoy living in a land which people like mahatma gandhi,subash chandra bose,tilak and many others sacrificed their lives for??as for mumbai...you shake her,you destroy her...yet she lives on.and i love her.

faith

balaji

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preparing for some high decibel days...

the celebrations have already begun.so glad that the dark clouds which brought some heavy rains for the past coupla weeks have bid adieu.these days are soo very different.not the usual ones...my home now occupies a herd of ppl rather than jus 4.this means more shoes outside my house,more the chitter chatter that happens in the evenings and more the fun.the powerful speakers which my TV boasts of is now put to shame.the high dB crackers make sure they are the only ones in the city to rattle our ear drums...the colorful shots in the sky is a pure visual treat.the sweets which i gobble up at very reg intervals makes me a sweeter guy today.jus hrd bush extending his greetings to the indian commn in the US.well....all i can wish them is a "HAPPY DE-WALL-I".the box of crackers thats rite next to me is a tempt inducer.i m having a cracker of a time.
i look out of the window.i see smiles.ppl r happy.almost all offices are closed.some still giving their extra to wrap things up and get into the diwali dhamaka.after all...this is a festival of hope,joy and happiness.all festivals in this world carry wid them a history and some significance.but in India...they also carry with them loads of joy,fun and happiness.the fact that indian youth are the happiest in the world bears testimony to this.


preparing for more decibels...no i m not plugging the cotton into my ears..
preparing for more pollution.....no i not staying away frm the place...
all i want to do now is get down to burst the crackers wid my dears...
coz this is time for fun and is a quantum of solace...


yours diwali
balaji

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please temme its real

i have dreamt several times of me walking down frm a castle and the entire army giving me a salute....or even saving a kid falling frm the top of a tower...the superhero way...or something very weird which when summed up together makes absolutely no sense...like me traveling in a plane and looking out of the window to suddenly find someone calling my name ...and that person turning out to be my mathematics prof who while still floating in the upper layers of atmosphere is scolding me for not submitting the assignment!!!..often there ve been times when i wud get too much into the dream and pinch myself only to understand later it was after all a dream...no ...i am not here to say that dreams can turn into realities.ppl have always been saying this..since 1020AD..but the dreams transforming into reality still remains a dream for many if not all...i somehow dislike that statement bcoz it doesnt define wht dreams actually are...visions or aim wud ve been much better a word...well...so whts making me talk so much abt dreams today....well they say that the world isnt that large a place that u can never hope to meet your old friends or relatives or even your teacher who taught u at school.it is not definitely one of the impossibles...which is wht happened today....i got to meet my secondary school class teacher!!!!!!!!!!!!!!...it was such a great moment and i cud least expect such a situation...with xcitement and me telling myself"r u sure this is not a dream??ru sure,balaji?"i always think its better to ask questions like this at times or else u cud end up getting up frm ur bed and greeting and shaking hands wid ur teacher and dad switches on the lites to find out that im actually shaking hands with the stabilizer wires!!...but i pinched myself several times today and the result...red marks in my arm...which means!!omg....its all real...i m actually speaking to my school teacher after soo many yrs...it was fun to bring those old memories alive....its always good to hear abt ur past that too frm someone who had known u very well....u knw sometimes it makes u say"hey was i that bad a guy at school?" or if u hate negation..."hey was i soo good a child?"..getting to hear someone spk abt u and wht u did those days gives u happiness much more than wht u gt seeing ur old pics or videos..trust me..shes one of my fav teachers and someone whom i consider has contributed something to wht i m today.meeting her and talking to her was great pleasure so much so i feel like meeting her again and again..when i tell this to my freinds back in mumbai....some are gonna be happy.....some surprised.,...some envy while d others may say"oh"...these wonderful moments really spice up ur life...telling u that the world isnt that large dude.....so keep ur hopes high....maybe the one u r dying to meet mite well bcum ur neighbour some day....
as for the red marks....i think they ve gone....
and this post im writing....is it real or am i taking the pillow for a keyboard??...

pls tell me its real


pinchfully urs...
/*ouch ouch*/
balaji

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ahem.....i m now 19

the feeling of blogging on ur bday is unique....something i got to realise today....the day started off with vibrations...my mobile went on at 00.00....the sound asleep me tried my best to locate the fone...after several wrong conclusions...i finally got my hands on it....gotcha!!sunken tone but sound mind....i said"whos this"....happy birthday!!! was the reply....that moment was awesome.....felt soo happy that some1 tried to call me up so early in the morn to convey the wishes.....by the time the call ended...i was far better....the sunken voice gave way to a clearer one and my mind was more excited than ever....minutes later at 00.05....my frnd had called me up to convey his wishes....nevah really expected to kick start the day like this....after a sms at 2.00...i decided to put an end to my continual sleep and plugged my ipod into my ears to get my sleep back....v had arranged for a function in a nearby temple at 6.00....so i got up at 5.00 and after a sip of caffeine...i started off to the temple...i had a great darshan....thanking god for all dat hes done....i returned home....it was soo gr8 to hear frm all my frnds and relatives....beleive me i cudnt have asked for more...i feel sooo happy to have some gr8 friends.....and that really makes me proud...i ve got my exams tomorow....i jus logged in to see my orkut profile and i thgt that i shud perhaps share my bday experience with u ll...u really dont know how much i m happy.....trust me.....u cant ask for more....



smiling more then ever
balaji(bday boy...:-))...)

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of popcorns & movies & patriotism

it was gr8 day today.coz i got to see a hindi film"jaane tu ya jaane na".it was a good watch and kept me glued to my seat till the end credits.this has been one of the long unchecked items in my planner and i m happy to ve really completed this task.:-)..
my dads wondering y all this planner,check & uncheck business doesnt happen when it comes to my studies.ishmiiile...!!!!
and yes....thers a discourse in the city tomorow abt sri.ramana maharishi for which me and my coupla friends have agreed to volunteer.i consider this as a great oppurtunity.i ve always enjoyed the company of such religious get-togethers.i take all these functions as a constant reminder of the richness and greatness of India's culture and my responsibilities towards it.

i m proud to be an INDIAN.

a very happy independence day...
balaji

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one month of no post........too long eh?

i dont feel good when ppl say i m not a frequent blogger.but after some thinking,i do realise that there are ppl oder dan me who make sense.i can pile up great excuses to answer the numerous mails that ve been flooding my inbox(gosh!i had a tuff time deleting them).but i thgt that this post can act as an appropriate reply.to be really honest......i wont say that my busy schedule is keeping me away frm blogging.its perhaps boredom.ever since i bcame a part of the sophomere club........things arent the same.although the 2nd yr sprung up a few surpises like the paper presentation festival,industrial visits etc........thers still something thats MISSING.i wudnt have been blabbering abt all his if i cud have found out wht that missing thing is.change is my tonic(medicinulus breakus).but i need to tell u this.my holiday was soooo good.in fact one of the best ones i ve ever had.i enjoyed every moment of that trip.be it spending time in a house surrounded on all sides by tea plantations and forests,or waking up in the wee hours and sippping a refreshing coffee,or getting to hear the elephants and birds instead of the buses and cars,looking at the contrasting shades of nature,the adventurous walk down the narrow moonlit path and the"ne time elephant may come"feeling........u really get to know so much only when u travel.thas y they say all those who dont travel are mad....others are nomad.i got an oppurtunity this time to walk along wid the jungle animals(hey folks at animal planet...u hear?).....wht fun it was...no i didnt intentd to do a steve irwin.i was actually on top of an elephant and it jus walked into the forests.through narrow paths...across the stream...taking each step doggedly.i ll try to put some fotos here.i had fun to the max.since my coll started....its been a bit hectic i shud say.the best par is that we have been planning to go for an industial visit.thats actually a 3 day trip to a company and getting to know wht working atmposhere is all abt,who are the ppl behind the show and how do they do it.it always exciting to go for trips such as these and when its along wid ur bunch of friends...its only going to add to the excitement.i promise not to disappoint the regular visitors of this blog and hence will keep posting interesting things.nd moreover i ll make sure i am more frequent.i havent stayed up so late for posting i guess.....and i cant take this further.

as i try mah best to keep my eyes open....
hugs,
balaji
(P.S.i yawned 7 times while typing the last 2 sentences)yaaawn...this is 8.

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good old pal

though i make it a point to call my school friends pretty often,i haven't been able to get a chance to meet and spend some time with them.i was just waiting for this..one of the members of my gang(1,2,3,....yeah ......can be called one) came up with the idea of meeting up at the beach.i was very much excited.informing my friends followed this.beleive me ......to do this job,i kinda used all the commn devices..!!!!!!!!yahoo mess,mobile,landline and even orkut scrap!!!!!i just wanted all of them to come no matter what.finally,the plan was solid and i was all geared up.we started by arnd 3.00 in the afternoon to reach the beach at 4.00.trust me.........twas so hot that the sun appeared to me as a big parasite...sucking away all ur energies.the only way to escape the heat and also the strange looks from the beach patrol(cmon........imagine!!!we r the only ones in the beach) was to go to the mall nearby.ah!!!!heaven.timely help is the best help.we straight away head to landmark,(the bookstore) and fell victim to the bright coverpages of some books.i was so fascinated by a book called"the book of human anatomy".......with 3d pics and great illustration,the book is a must for aspiring docs and in general all ppl who think they have a flair for nature.is there any soul in this world who can get me that as a birthday present????i now understand the value of friendship.dad's no enemy either....hehe....i tell ya..the mall is great place for spending time..after abt spending more than an hour..we head to the beach.now the atmosphere looks ok with many others in the beach too.you could feel the breeze hitting you and the waves splashing all over.i m a true hydrophilic guy..get bowled over by "the waters"(get it shravan??).my feet always finds a place in adidas and my friend's wallet is heavy.so its mostly a "one guy to look over" kinda situation.we take turns.whats like spending time in the beach without popping in some raw mango with the masala on them and some ice creams.i strictly abide by all these rules.go hell with the diet idea pal...enjoy ur life!!.another beautiful thing u get to see in the beaches is meeting so many people.thers so much you can learn.with the cricket stadium lights on one side and the harbor on the other,i tried my photographic skills to get a panorama pic.i suddenly feel some vibes under my pants.the mobile's display says "home" calling.i walk away frm the beach cleaning off the sand stuck to my pants.i stopped an auto-rickshaw and set home.i looked at the beach again.the sun had set.

hugs
balaji

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ouch!!!!!that hurt

rising seems to be the apt word that could be common to the gold prices,oil,real estate and the tempertaure here at chennai.its jus tooooooo hot here.the mercury is rising every day and the met dept predicts that the worse days are yet to come.chennai is not a stranger to these climatic situations but sometimes you cant really carry on."stay indoors" is possibly the way to beat the heat and with the exams round the corner,i m learning to spend quality time at home.evenings are much better.day before,i decided to avoid driving and take the public transport instead.i just thought that could be a smart way of avoiding the heat and also saving fuel.while returning home,i made up my mind to get down the running bus instead of walking from the bus stop thats a few metres away.i have done this a hundred times before,ok.so its not the"i m excited abt this"kinda situation.just when i was about to place my foot down the road,the driver gave it an acceleration and the result.......torn pants,cuts and that "ouch!!"feeling.i was on the road with people starring at me and all i could do was"ah!!no worries..nothing......just a small cut....thats all".i made up the cocky expressions and went home.its better now.yesterday when my brother was trying out the same stuff as me(he actually wanted to do it from an auto),i said no and stopped him.it wasnt me but my experience that spoke i guess.they say"a good decision comes from experience but experience comes only from a bad decision".wish me health

hugs
balaji

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10,000 CC--------a fight for water

10,000 BC was a film that was in theatres till a few days ago until the theatre folks were forced to remove it.i didnt see the movie but i think its abt some crap....perhistoric times,amazingly huge creatures,human ancestors,all fighting with each other and as usual thers a guy who is supposed to be the hero who falls in love with a girl and finally kills the monster and the story ends with both of them living happily ever after......huh!!now thats the 10000th movie of that kind.........rightly named.now thers a problem here between tamilnadu and karnataka who are fighting for water.its not about those hunger strikes,its also not abt your identity,its not about your protests but its all about the people who are starving for drinking water.i have always thought that thers something seriously wrong with people who walk in protests holding a placard or a banner and shouting slogans.i dont think thats a good way of sorting out things.what the affected people need is helping hands,they need someone who can be among them and gets things better.i understand through the media reports that many innocent people are getting killed and injured on either side of the border.its terribly sad to see incidents such as these which weaken the unity which we hold as "Indians".many great scholars have voiced out their opinions and what we demand now is the settlement of the issue.its been 60 years of free independent india and surely not a one that great souls like mahatma gandhi would have dreamt of.it would be fair enought to talk to representatives from both states and come to a good conclusion that could provide benefit to the people.or else the consequences would be bitter.i jus hope that this fight for water stops here.lets not make this fight for 10000cc of water like 10000bc

hugs
balaji

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just thought i should remind you............

the date of my previous post and my new one mite just explain it all.calling myself unlucky to live in a world where things dont just stay in people's mind too long.i m not sounding pissed off.....its jus the outcome of a terrible 2 week of examinations.my room is full of books,calculators and alarm clocks.when 6 hrs of sleep mite jus sound a bit too long,when u need to think twice b4 eating something,when you need to look at the time display during phone calls and those dim grandpa-days study lamps.its not that i hate exams.its jus that i like other things too.exams are now almost over with just 1 to go and thats why i found time to put up this post.weeks before,i used to be the video crazy guy.i was like"call the folks from youtube.....i ll pay really nice for those videos".orkut was interesting too.today the scrap sounds crap.i prefer blogging instead.people mite say its human.well........,maybe .all i need to have at this time is something that could kinda bring me back.i have started reading"autobiography of a yogi"-'what you are holding in ur hand is not just a book but a spiritual masterpiece'....atleast that what the coverpage said.i managed to read about 30 pages and then my mind wasnt into it.i hate doing things without my mind in it.its been a week now and the book mark still lies there. perhaps things would get better in the coming days.and yes,i m planing a renovation of my blog and that could be expected in the next few days.

OH GOD........GET ME THOSE TURN-ONS!!!!!!

hugs
balaji

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gave a break to the "knight life" in chennai to experience the "night life"city-BANGALORE.

26th was the republic day and forunately the next day was sunday.nothing more needed to make a plan for a perfect holiday.being in chennai which is mostly sunny,we were deprived of the pleasure of cold.we decided to make it to bangalore this time.i have always loved this city.i have been to this place earlier and every time i return,my liking for this place jus bcums more.my uncle stays in bangalore.so it wud be gr8 to spend a couple of days with them too,we thought.we booked our tickets and left for bangalore on friday the 25th.as its jus a 6 hr drive frm chennai,travelling wudnt get boring either.since childhood i have always had the fascination of travelling to places which are entirely unique in their culture,lifestyle,food etc.residing in india,i knew that i wud get more than i wished.a 6hr drive frm my place takes me to a land where ur language no longer helps you,to a place where the climate is very different,a place where cuisine is different too!!.i truly love this.we arrived in bangalore at abt 4.00 in the morning.the blanket which i got as a gift some days ago was now put into use and i felt satisfied.we head straight to my uncle's house which is in the outskirts of the city.enjoying the sight of the tranquil lake with coffee mug in ur hand is what you get to do every morning.simply awesome!!!.we decided to spend the saturday at home to get rid of the tiredness.i tried my luck in a badminton game and ended up feeling proud with the way i play.no surprise that i have got the job of mosquito swatter in my house now.chatter,laughs,plans and beautiful memories dominated the night as we slowly sunk ourselves into the warm woolen blankets.i woke up to the customary sight of the lake and said"life's good".we wanted to make the most out of the sunday......i asked my uncle abt the intersting places nearby.there were many.after hours of dicussion,we zeroed in on visitng the bannerghatta wildlife sanctuary.the lion and tiger safari here is much talked abt.i am not me without a good breakfast.so is my brother.when the question was thrown open to the herd of family members in the car,everyone agreed.wish things cud be fine as this always.breakfast was just ok.i got back into the car with a hope for a good lunch and a great day ahead.we finally reach our destination.we were greeted by the sound of the elephant.we bought the tickets and spent some wondeful time in the zoo.the tiger and lion safari was simply superb and i was lucky enuf to spot a dozen of them including the white tiger and was able to click some snaps too.elephant ride followed this.it was a very memorable experience.grrr......grrr.....grrr.......i am reminded by my stomach that its lunch time.i m sorry if people mistook it to be a lion's roar.we wave at the elephants and get back into the car.we stop at a good place for lunch.the lunch was delicious and i was happy to have compensated for the bad breakfast.by the time we reach back home,its 4 in the evening.relaxing is what i did then.as i had to get back to coll the next day,we wrap up everything.this trip was very memorable indeed.also it came at a time when the entire family was desperately needing a break,making it more special.as i bid adieu to this great city,my mind is filled wih pleasant memories.......i just hoped for many such experiences.i gave up the battle of fighting with my drooping eyes.....i slept only to wake up the next day morning at chennai.my dad asked me "how was the trip,balaji?".i didnt reply.why.......wasnt he the one who taught me not to speak till you brush in the morning!!!

hugs
balaji

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2008 ahoy!!!

another year gone by.pretty well,i shud say.i know that u all r bored listening to or reading abt the interesting and not so interesting things that happened in 2007."song of the year","movie of the year","defining moments of 2007"my god!!!!!jus wondering who sang "54 channels and nothing on"?.but v know that the previous year was special to all of us in some way or the other.it gave us some amazing highs and some major lows.we learnt,we taught,we shared,we laughed,we cried and now its time to look back.and perhaps say thank you.
in 2007,u cud have met with some problems.
its important to forget them and look forward for a great year ahead.its all   
the more important to sit back and think as to where you cud have gone wrong......pause am i deviating from my promise of not boring u all. 31st nite has always been special to all but there are certain things which i hate.
read them and pinch me if u share similar opinions.
1. new year special prog. that are aired on 31st nite like "song of the year","movie of the year","defining moments of 2007" etc.
2.replying to the new year greeting messages on my cell phone.long live the man who brought in the "send to all" option.
3.taking those resolutions which comes along with a condition"MUST BE FOLLOWED ATLEAST FOR A DAY"
4.the dinner buffet that carries the tag"rs.1500"instead of the usual 500.
5.the interviews of actors,their likes and dislikes.....the irony is that all the 3 channels telecast the interview and each of them have the"EXCLUSIVE TAG" on!!!!!!!
6.when i was a kid,i hated new zealand celebrate the new year b4 india did!!!!!!
7.sometimes you are too tired but you have to wait till the clock strikes 12.
8.those midnite calls which i get from my near and dears to convey the greetings.i understand that they love me so much.i am at loss of words but at loss of sleep too.
9.my dad never has this prob.his company has made him resistant to his.software jobs makes you resitant too!!something that should be included in the package too i guess.so suddenly when he gets a call late nite,he immediately says "good morning to all"(where were the calls from?)

but i had a great time yesterday.i had gone for a movie"taare zameen par".hats off to the entire crew.my heart melted and my lacrimal glands were too active.the movie was surely"one of its kind".its a strong suggest.aamir khan......a great story fantastically told and totally moving.
it has affected our family so much that my mom hums the song every now and then.its playing in my ipod.its my dad's caller tune.its playing in my pc as i am writing this.

i wud like to convey my greetings to all of you.have a great year ahead.may this year give you loads of happiness and may god answer all your prayers.

hugs,
balaji

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