What Men have made of men?

The title has been inspired from the poem, Written in early spring, by William Wordsworth. Man seems to have crossed the threshold of being human and has become so much cruel. This poem is my reaction to the increasing abuse and rape of women, who most deserve love, care and affection.

I write this with a sense of disbelief

and a feeling of amalgamated shame

My thoughts are smeared in grief

with a tinge of anger flame

 

How can you be proud of a nation

where women get misrep

In the chart of social evolution

we have been taking a toddler step

Mankind is now a misnomer

for Man has stopped being kind

and these thoughts around my mind hover

to help protect nature's best find

Man has shed his human-ness

and set the beast let loose

Strong laws and quick justice

how long can we afford to snooze?

If you say its the attire

that makes a man instigate

In all the sense of satire

I wish you a better fate

We kill her even before she plays the game

to every mother's sigh

We forget its the men to blame

who gave the X and wh'Y'

Lets do something to make them feel abash

and resort to deal them tough

I wish God could use a cache

and punish them quick enough

We have waited more than we should

and we cant do it longer

It's time we join hands and stood

against men who are less men and more ogre

lets spread the love most sought

and help her as she is shaken

let's all sit down and give a thought

and let the humane feelings reawaken

As this poem draws to an end

I hope men stop being sick

I ask for their ways to mend

to every tom, harry and DICK

-Sayee Balaji

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A day at Wharton

Last Saturday, I had the opportunity to go to Wharton to attend the 17th Indian Economic Forum. The speakers for the day were big names from various spheres that drive the Indian economy - Politics,Healthcare, Education, Infrastructure and Media( in the order of how they should be ). I was very keen on listening to each of these speakers and what ideas they have to shape our tomorrow. The first session was Arvind Kejriwal's. He spoke with passion. He had ideas. Not sure if those ideas are going to work. A political circus that India is today, where most of the show is run by animals and jokers trained to wiggle and act at the swish of a whip...having ideas and a futuristic thought is commendable enough. A chunk of the audience felt his ideas are just vaporware and might not address the problems to be tackled. I am not too sure about this. Being part of the race that mocked the Wright Bros when they said they would make flying a reality, I am not too worried. I'd rather let the misanthropic feeling gracefully sink in. Kejriwal spoke of how his party would function like a corporate( in terms of efficiency, not motives) and how measures would be taken to address some critical problems at the grassroots level. For one, no one has tried to take this level of granularity in addressing an issue. And if they were to work as planned, I'd look at them as harbingers of change and development. Whether Kejriwal would be able to survive the alligators of corruption-drenched politicians and dynasty leaders as he swims through a pseudo democratic India, remains to be seen. We have waited all along choosing between the devil and the deep blue sea. I wouldn't mind waiting for this.

The next session was Montek Singh Ahluwalia's, the deputy chairman of the Planning Commission of India. An Oxford grad he is, he was good with this speech. But I felt his goodness stopped with the choice of vocabulary. He didn't really explain why India is performing poorly compared to the other countries. He didn't really have a solution for the future. There are 2 types of planning that one can do. 'Plan today for today' and 'Plan today for tomorrow'. Then there was his, 'Plan today for yesterday'. What I mean here is, he seems to be someone who takes remedial plans than trying to do things upfront. I call this, 'Pizza Planning', where you can just work for a Margherita and then add the required toppings towards the end and still getaway with it. Might taste good, but good for health? Maybe not. What I am asking for here is a home cooked meal. He is after all , the chef of the planning kitchen and I'd expect him to know this.

Keeping up with the food topic, the next session was lunch! Was decent. Pasta, wraps, brownies and juice. Need I say more?. The session to follow was on Private Equity and Venture Capitalism. This is when I started to realize I was in Wharton, but I wasn't in Wharton yet! I stepped out for a walk rather than force myself to google every word of what they spoke. This turned out to be interesting. I saw several police officers lined up at the gate. Turns out, there were a group of protesters outside the building voicing against the decision of the Forum to un-invite Narendra Modi for the conference. The protest was a surprise to everyone out there,even the cops. The protest was done in Gandhigiri style, distributing hot gujarati food packed in lunch boxes! I accepted the box with a grin and started to "venture" into everything that was in it. My own version of venture capitalism.

The next session was on Women empowerment and Shabana Azmi just had to be there. The talk was good and this is a no-brainer. Women empowerment is very essential to our nation and we should do whatever it takes to root out female foeticide/infanticide, dowry and differential treatment. No country can be called developed, unless Women have equal opportunities. Gender has no role in dichotomizing rights. From what I hear and see, I think its getting better each day. So, let's keep up with that.

The next couple of sessions to follow were on Healthcare, Education and Infrastructure. Not all aspects were touched. But the ones that were debated, I feel the panel did justice. Healthcare is the backbone of any country. Our problems are complex. We have multiple problem statements. We need to transition from paper records to electronic health network on one end, and we need to first make healthcare accessible to 57% rural India on the other. We need to promote and boast about medical tourism that's been on the rise over the last few years and we need to tackle the high rates of malnourishment among rural children. We might have to do this together, each of us taking different goals and meeting them. This should be the way to go for the future. Education - Things that I learn, I want to know why and how, not what, when and where. We need to prepare our societies to encourage children to follow their passion and this could become a reality only when all the avenues have enough job opportunities. In other words, we need to become a 'Hobby friendly' job market, where people could pursue jobs in the field they have always loved. Infrastructure - Can you please stop building makeshift flyovers and save us the embarrassment from other nations as it breaks down? Can you help me get home quicker and less stressful so that I have better time to spend with family? Open questions, answers lie somewhere.

The last session of the day was Media. Javed Akhtar, Shabana Azmi and Boman Irani on the dais. Was entertaining and had the biggest audience. Shows how much people love them and how much responsible they should be, as an instrument of Indian democracy. They debated films and journalism. Nothing can be perfect. But I feel we are in fact coming with good films these days. No point in going brouhaha over the bikini scene in a movie or a bad song lyric. Not a utopian world. Let's look at it as a choice basket and we are free to pick ours. Journalism has two sides again. I am seeing liability and accountability on the rise with news channels questioning more and more. But on the other hand, we need to stop having Aishwarya Rai's pregnancy as a flashing news headline. We also need to stop being stupid in live telecasting police operations( 26/11) and think about the nation before channel TRPs.

Healthcare, Education, Infrastructure and Social Health are the key pillars that will shape our future. We need to plan to orchestrate these instruments well and create a wonderful song, that is India!All these seem to be pieces of a giant jigsaw puzzle. But I am hopeful we will be able to put them together. After all, its a billion hands working on it.

Thanks,
Sayee

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The disappearing red tribe

Less pay, people starting to travel light, ramps and travel friendly bags all have a reason for their dwindling population. A decade or two ago, they were the sultans of stations. They were the go-to guys to know which train would arrive on what platform. “When in doubt, ask the porter” was the unanimous mantra followed by all travelers. Draped in soiled red shirt, a lungi or pant depending on which part of India you are and a towel wrapped around the head as a turban to ease the weight of the luggage, the porter was a very known figure among every traveler. For Rs.20, he would carry your bulging luggage( perhaps moaning about its weight which is almost half the traveler's) from your seat to the taxi or rickshaw stand outside the station. A porter was also the fastest creature in the station . With all that weight on his head, he would still be twice as fast as you and would sneak between people to reach the destination happily waiting for you.

This 5 minutes is quite a challenge. You would have to keep a track of where he is so that you don't lose him or more precisely, your luggage. The deal to fix a price to hire a porter is interesting in itself. He would start off with a quote to which you would instantly disagree and convince him of how the distance is not too long and the luggage isn't that heavy either. Makes me wonder why we need to hire a porter then!! After several rounds of negotiation and him narrating the plight of his family, you finally agree for a price. He wraps the turban on his head, bends a little and places the luggage on his head, hangs one over his shoulder and carries one in his hand. There have been several times when I have felt sorry for the guy, especially when his age looks unsuitable for this job but he has to do it to win bread for his family. The porter is also a very intelligent man. Some say, he can even guess all the items in your bag just by lifting it! That may be too tall a claim , and most of us would tend to disagree. But without him, traveling around the station would have been a hassle.

When you travel in trains these days, you see very few porters around. The ample display boards everywhere tell you which train arrives in what platform and when. Samsonite and the likes have made the phrase “ sliding your luggage” more meaningful than “carrying it”. Ramps have replaced staircases in several stations making our job all the more easier. I am not trying to put the entire red clan in good light. I have heard about theft of luggage by them. Some even get into a bad argument if you don't agree to their price. While these are totally unacceptable, I feel sad for the ones who are good but don't find customers for their living. They are the ones who have decided to carry your weight to carry the burden of their family. All they might earn each day would be close to two hundred rupees. We all fall prey to the exorbitant ask by auto-wallas. Some of us fight back, while some yield. It might be worth giving the red clan a second chance.

So, the next time, whenever you travel, hire a porter and support him. All I ask is for you to “Carry” this thought as you travel.

P.S : This post was not in exchange of a free service by a porter. Except my laptop and my coffee mug, there is no personal affinity with the color red.

Thanks, Sayee

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Unique 'Rail'ationship

Last week, I took a train from Chennai to Bangalore and what you are going to read for the rest of this post, is about my love hate affair with Indian Railways. Travelling on Indian Railways is a life in itself. The public sector is so intertwined with our culture and way of life that it goes a step beyond helping you reach places, to teaching you the art of living. If you have read enough philosophy books or have even quickly glanced at the italics under the title of every chapter, you know this important lesson : Never give up! If you have booked a ticket through IRCTC, the online reservation system, you know exactly what I am talking about. The website has been carefully designed to test the patience of Indians and give the fruit of success to the one who survives through it. Hindusim says, "Only if you commit a sin, you take a birth. Else you are given moksha". Well, IndianRailism says " Only if you commit a sin( agents/bribe ), you get a berth. Else you are given ' Website not found / Server Error ' ".

The joy one gets as he breaks out from the cocoon of IRCTC is beyond words. Not the height of joy, but the person becomes so tired and tested along the way, he loses the power of speech. "Never give up" doesn't stop there. It is a very powerful mantra uttered by all senior folks, while at the ticket reservation counter, hoping to get the lower berth. The poor senior folks have climbed enough, that they don't want to take that ladder again. More on the Hinduism-Railism parallelism later. Back to my trip. I sinned, so I travelled. If you ever want to see a place with over 10 thousand people, bustling with activity at 5 am, come to Chennai central. The next challenge - Make your way to the correct platform. It isn't really a challenge to reach the correct platform. But it becomes one if you have just about 10 minutes before the train departs. Challenge taken and job well done. Engine chugs. Train departs. All trains are not the same. Some are fast, some are slow. Some are on time, while some are consistently late. Some pamper you with food and beverages, while some treat you as yet another mere mortal. The one I took is fast, is on time and serves food.

Ever since I was a kid, I used to love being on the trains. I love to watch the passing towns, villages and paddy and I love waving to the kids, mostly ending up getting a similar acknowledgment. If you travel general class, you can sense the real India. Back to Religion-Rail parallelism now. "Men are of several kinds, shapes, sizes and smell. Treat everyone with love and care". Well, not quite. I am not sure how you can love a co-passenger who comes in with 10 over dimensional luggages for a family of 3. How to love a co-passenger who is loud or burps louder. How to love someone who stares at you the entire journey without a smile, as if you are a convict who has just escaped from prison? My current journey did not have any of this. But, have experienced these before.

In a cabin of 8 berths, you have 8 different characters. Some keep munching all along. A real issue comes if you have a lower berth and you want to go to sleep. You can't unless all the others go to bed. And if you are an early morning person and if the person on the middle berth is a travelling salesman sleeping with the disgusting stincking pair of socks, good luck!. You have to adopt, what is taught in Yoga as the C curve posture. Because the middle berth cannot be brought down yet, and you have woken up because you had nothing else to do, you have to stick your head and legs out, while resting the middle portion of your body on the seat. You do this until that person gets up, or if that doesn't seem like a near future event, you just go back to sleep. You will then be frequented by beggars and hawkers to lessen the weight of your wallet.

Remember, most of these journeys are long. So, when you travel with family or friends, you come prepared with some games like cards or snakes 'n' ladders to kill the afternoon boredom. As a kid, I always wanted to step out of the train during stops and scare the hell out of parents by not boarding back till the train starts to move( Actually, I would be twice scared. Just that we tend not to show it! ). As you do all this and finally make it to the destination, you come out a whole new person. You have met new people, seen new things, heard different languages and even tasted different food. All this just over a train journey. This is the love I have with Indian Raliways. It gives you a new experience, every single journey.

As a kid, we used to travel a lot between Mumbai and Chennai. Reaching Chennai, I used to love the auto-rickshaw( Madras autos are brighter yellow and also sound more). I use to love the merry go round ride on the Gemini flyover and I used to love the first cup of filter kaapi on arrival. This time, When I returned from Bangalore, I still enjoyed and loved all of this. It is good that some things in life don't change. As they say, you love it or hate it, you just can't ignore Indian Railways.

-Sayee

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In search of cerebral vacations

Out of the several things man has been known to continue doing ever since his race inherited earth, is taking vacations. Strange it may be, but the fact is man just cannot be put in a monotonous world for ever. There is a yield point, beyond which our brain and our body stops cooperating, gets on a strike and demands a break. This is when a special impulse travels through the nerve cell and stimulates a reaction from us, which usually is a shoulder shrug or a customary fling of an object as a expression of you being irate. This is when the outside world knows they wont be seeing you for the next few days.

Vacation planning is not easy. In fact, research tells that most of one's vacation is spent in planning one than actually enjoying it. The most common factor that causes this is the very nature of human kind, unique, non decisive and greed. Vacation means to travel with company. If you go alone, it's not just worth spending much just on you. You'd rather be at home and swirl in the endless cycle of YouTube recommendations. If you have company, you are placed in a better situation but that comes with a conditions apply tag. The asterisk reads good luck arriving at a decision. Thanks to varied individual tastes, this task is time consuming and tough. You usually start on the origin of the convincing curve, where you are dominating and you put forth you vacations ideas. The rest of the curve is arguments and the end of the curve is when you decide to let go. You either break down halfway through the curve or you travel till the end of it. Very few have succeeded in getting lucky at the origin.

As herculean a task it may sound, there are tips to get around with it and still make things work in your favor. Enter, "Cerebral Vacations". Remember, the prime reason why you are planning a travel is because your brain gave up and you body had no say in it. So, if you can give a break to your brain cells and give them enough rest, they would stop complaining and you would feel much better too. You can also skip the pains of going through the curve of crappiness. Sounds like an idea? Great! But what exactly do you do to take a cerebral vacation? Pretty simple. There are, according to me, 2 ways to do it. One, Do Nothing. Two, Do something that means nothing to you. The first task can sound weird, but trust me, we are all capable of doing that and without our conscious, we have been already doing them often. Example, stare at your wall for five minutes. Or better, focus completely on your food as you eat it. These acts are highly recommended and have shown promising results. The second task requires resources - Computer and Internet. The net is so full of shit that you can search from UFOs to a ukrainian recipe to the fattest man on earth to viral videos and to the current temperature at the base station in Antarctica.

When all these fail, start blogging or read one.

-Sayee

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Another Diwali wested!

Sulking in my room dimly lit, the only sound I hear around me are from the strokes from my keyboard as I type and some sounds of laughter from outside the quaint pub across the street. Those laughter sounds seem to fade away. So I assume those people moved. All I am left with now is the QWERTY crackers this Diwali.

A little while ago, I spoke to my parents back home where all my relatives have gathered to enjoy the festivities together. This is one of the most beautiful aspects of a festival. In this fast paced world where people are too busy to even enjoy their own lives, its moments such as these that bring people together and rests faith in humanity that knows to share joy, love and happiness. Of the many festivals that we celebrate, Diwali is my favorite as it is much more than just another celebration. It is the excuse for kids to get new clothes. It is yet another day of shopping for the ladies with newer and better arrivals carefully designed to extend their shopping time endlessly. It is the much deserved break for the men from their everyday toil at work. It is the time when the shop owners light up their shops and decorate them to attract shoppers. It is the excitement for the village folks to come to the city and be amazed at its sheer vibrance and to pick their favorite clothes. It is the hope for the several thousand folks who have come to the city to earn their bread and now would like to go home and spend the Diwali with their near and dear ones. While the festival glows in such glory, we should not forget that this is also the time of the year when several innocent and hard working kids in the cracker factories lose their lives in the dark while working to brighten up the lives for others.

Diwali marks the return of Lord Ram victorious after his battle with Ravan in Sri Lanka. This is a two day festival but preparations and the festive mood begin as early as a week before the actual day. The way it works out in our family is we all decide to meet up at either one of our homes and celebrate Diwali together. The ladies get busy with making delicious sweets and snacks. The men get ready to empty their wallets while the kids help them in the same. Me, my brother and my cousins used to get flyers from all firework shops to decide and make a budget on what to buy this Diwali. This is no easy task and trust me, is usually better than most presidential debates or at least the most recent one. The crackers come in hundreds of varieties and colors and sounds. There are the usual set of fire fountains, wheels , bombs and rockets and then there are themed crackers that usually represent movie stars, national icons and sports. We carefully go through the exhaustive list and decide on about three dozen of them that we think would not be too much of spending by dad. We usually come up with an estimate much beyond our dad's and then we finally agree on the average.

There is always this gleam that we used to sport on our faces as we purchased those crackers and brought them home. It was as if we had won a million dollars as promised by that UK bank in my spam email or the apple i-pad that we were supposed to win for being the 1000th visitor to a particular website. Kids often boast of their set of crackers as being the best over their friends'. All of them do. Finally, on the day of Diwali, it would turn out that all of them have almost the same set of crackers. The day of Diwali is marked by several customs and traditions that have been followed and passed on through ages and generations. This includes a special oil bath in hot water mixed with a few drops of the holy Ganga river, a body smear of sheekakai, accept the new dresses from the eldest member of the family after doing namaskarams and then you are all set to get started with your decibel show. I have always stayed in an apartment complex and we always had the curiosity to see who would burst the first set of crackers for the day. I remember getting up as early as 3 am to give some time for the rituals and be the alarm bang for the residents. AFter several hours of bursting crackers and taking pictures, we go back home to have a heavy feast and then conquer the couch to watch the special shows on TV. Sweets and snacks are then exchanged with friends and neighbors. When the sun has seen enough of the city and decides to retire, we go back to our cracker business again. This cycle repeats for the next two days. The remainders of the crackers are saved for a later festival that comes a month from now.

As the two day festival draws to an end, its time to dive back to the routine everyday life. Relatives bid adieu, shops start to reopen, buses and trains swarm the city as they bring back people from all around the state back to their jobs, kids get sulky about getting back to school and dad gets ready for their usual work. And moms, they are extra special and all they need now is a big thank you from all of us and some much deserved and needed rest for the rest of week. But such wonderful people moms tend to be, you find your lunch packed in your boxes before leaving to school the next morning.

It is Diwali today and I now have to go to bed for I have a project submission later this afternoon and an assignment the next day. Happy Diwali to me!

-Sayee

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Sandy!

That's not my friend who studied college with me. That's the hurricane also dubbed as Frankenstorm by some, that left us east-coasters wind-punched, drenched and hence indoors. Things in Baltimore weren't too bad. The rains and the winds seemed like they wanted to join in on the Halloween spirit and lashed at us bigger than ever. I hear that several areas in Maryland, Virginia, DC and New York have been greatly affected with power outages and floods. I really hope conditions improve quickly, businesses reopen and people get back to their routine stronger.

This is the first major hurricane I have witnessed after coming to the US. We had one sometime last year. But thankfully, it wasn't much drama. Just some items kept near the windows fell and people had to set their hair again. One of the things I saw and really appreciate is the emergency preparedness system here. Things aren't perfect. But, there is so much to learn and incorporate in India. We were quick enough to take the naming trend from here and started giving regional names for our cyclones. Why not put in place better tracking and response systems?

Earlier in the weekend, the path of the cyclone was traced out and all the areas that were likely to be affected were notified and asked to start acting quick. There are emergency preparedness and response teams at every level - Federal, State, City and also institutional. Evacuation routes planned, special emergency helplines created, every person in the city is notified to stock essential supplies, schools and colleges inform every student about the situation and change in schedule of classes and more! Hospitals ensured of power and in the worst case, patient shifts were also planned. The power company reaches out to every customer seeking support and asking to be safe and make sure that all power dependent devices are fully charged as they try their best to provide uninterrupted service. And what's more, they also had real time data with geographical mapping on the individual houses that has suffered power outage and those were changed immediately on being restored.

I cannot help but draw a quick comparison to the system we have back in India. Imagine the number of lives we could save with better tracking and response. Why should a patient who came surviving a critical condition later lose the battle to a power outage? Why should people stand,watch and lament as hundreds of coastal houses get washed away? Why should people be left hungry and starving without essential supplies? It is Halloween and perhaps the right time for these questions to haunt us. Man has been selfish, cruel and ungrateful towards nature. And when she responds, we just can't take it. Let's try our best to get back to good equations with her. Keeping in mind, she's a woman, that task is probably going to take a while. Meanwhile, why not try to be better prepared until the next time she shows her wrath?

Sayee

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Love of seasons

It's Fall in Baltimore. Time for the trees to try their new outfits and look colorful. Fall is my favorite season after the monsoons. Monsoons back in India have a special charm to them.

Ancient paintings, writings and cultural practices such as reverence for rain as God, appear to be like a bread crumb trail to the man-monsoon relationship. As a kid, I lived in Mumbai and I remember the wait for the first shower spell. We used to have a countdown that would appear in our newspapers eagerly waiting for their arrival. People would prepare well in advance for the monsoons. The seasonal hawkers would know that it's perhaps time to replace the artifacts with umbrellas and raincoats. The manufacturing companies would know to make them attractive and appealing to the current trend in the city or have the usual age-wise segments. Pink, Green and Yellow with cartoon characters for the kids, retaining the color but filling them with flowers instead for the ladies and the consistent all black/grey ones for the men. Within this, you would always have people, like me back then, who would want something halfway between kids and men. We don't get that luxury of choice and usually end up using mom/dad's.

The city doesn't come to a standstill when it rains, though the infrastructure might suggest so. People have learnt to live and love the city as it is. The monsoons bring with them a drop in the mercury which gives a huge breather for the people from the scorching summer that just bid adieu. Evening sets in early. I love the hot street snack accompanied with a glass of tea, enjoying the rains and watching how people react differently towards things. You see a mom walking her kid back from school and you notice how she leaps over the puddle of water while her kid jumps right into that. The smoke, the rain, the sound all suddenly seems so picturesque and inviting.

Continuing with the 'people react different towards things at different ages' idea, I want to leap ahead to my college life when I moved to Chennai.I started to avoid the puddles, but now because I drove my scooter. My allegiance to the street snack didn't change, in fact it grew. Used to love riding together with my friends sometimes doing weird things on our way, stopping at every other street to grab a hot spicy bite and then looking for the nearest cool drink shop to douse the tongue-on-fire! We used to tuck our shirts out as stepped out of college and love getting drenched. We were more eager to get home, not to avoid the rains, but to dry, get into the pyjamas, have that sip of tea and enjoy your show on TV. What a life, man! Who doesn't love holidays? we all do. And back in Chennai, the government used to declare state wide holiday for schools and colleges if heavy rains are predicted. It was usually a scrolling marquee on the news channel that had all the cities and towns that declared a holiday. I haven't prayed more than this to have my city in that list!

As I recollect all those wonderful memories, I feel I should go back sometime and re do all of that. It's been a little over a year since I came to the US and I am introduced to a new season, Fall! Had never seen trees getting yellow and red except in Windows wallpapers and Indian movie songs that were shot abroad. And trust me when I say this, the view is absolutely stunning. Which is why, its my second most favorite season. My reaction to fall isn't that different. I love walking over the heap of brightly colored leaves on the pavement, I love sipping tea and I still crave for a hot street snack. It's just the beginning of Fall and I have already fallen for it!! So much so, it has decided to make me give a heartbeat to this blog site. I hope to keep it pumping.

-Sayee

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walking alone in the poorly lit lane

That i have restrained myself from new posts for close to a month now,often makes me question myself.I stand witness to the transformations in me,some internal while others are cutaneous.the latter is boring and fails to convince me to discuss or spend more time talking it.The former however needs attention.

I ve always dreamed of being different and doing different things.For close to 20 years now,that i ve spent in this world,i ve constantly made a sketch of what i want to become and what plan i have for life.some,in fact most, were volatile while a few still retain its shape . some of these plans or wishes would be kiddish and be more likely true in a comic book than someone's life.I dont trash those for i believe those were the biggest wish 1 could have when i was 5.As you grow,so do your thoughts and your view of the world.you meet new people, you hear new words and see new places...all these have an impact on your thoughts.one of such thoughts that have cemented within me now is the craving for intelligence.

For the past 20 days or so, one could find me doing things which arent so common in my context[atleast the way i ve been so long].but this change,if at all you think it is...is not an immediate result of a reaction but a watered plant of wishes and interests.the wish to do something different in life.the wish to grow up to become a great human being.a wish to mature academically and emotionally.

I have this feeling of a boy who is just making his way to the stage for the 1st time and he is to stand before a vast crowd mixed with people of different tastes,cultures and habits.I have this feeling of a student anxiously waitin for his exam results sometimes imagining a post-result drama or consequences only to see that most of them jus drain away.i dont want to leave this situation for i feel this has made me think hard about life and what i need to do to have it the way i want it to be.

These thoughts have been running continually in my mind so much so that i dont hear the phone ring or notice the vehicle in front of mine.i recall a couple of incidents where i have had a close call with a vehicle and how i felt happy and drove more carefully then.people driving close to me could recollect how my lips would always be in motion giving the feeling that i was humming a song or using a hands free.but neither of them are true.i speak to myself.about what i have done so far.what i need to do now.

my conversations with people are now limited..the latest one being the small fight i had with my bro for having closed my work which i had left unsaved on my pc. for i find that you waste a lot of energy in useless unproductive conversations.though you cant debate global warming and price rise 24*7,you can definitely limit your time spent in useless talks.even if you are not substituting the saved time with something useful, you can pat yourself for atleast not wasting them.my interest in machine,especally the pc is on a new high.i find this chap whose mother tongue is binary way too comfortable to discuss things."How machines can replace man?" is an endlessly alluring theme and makes the perfect mood for a lazy sunday afternoon.

I'm reading books, the latest one being "other colors" by Orhan Pamuk whom the eastern and western world gracefully own.I'm reading about him and am fascinated by his intelligence.its after reading him, i realised how i ve fooled myself by refraining from writing.writing and reading gives you a pleasure that no other art gives.
the television is filled with crap.people are sometimes boring.i dont know if this is making me aloof,but i m sure i m doing things which i feel is right.even if things dont turn out the right way,i can be proud that i m the sole one to blame, for no one else had influenced my decision.people say that i am unstable while some feel its difficult for them to understand me.a curve on my face is the only emotion in response.dunno where this is leading to.but whatever the path is, i m sure its got loads to offer.you need to keep traveling and be a wanderlust ,for life is too short and the world too large to be understood and enjoyed.

Now that i have written, i genuinely feel content and maybe i could now be more me than before.now,my neighbor wouldn definitely complain that i didnt smile at him while sharing the elevator.
life is amazing.life is beautiful.
so much intelligence around!so inspiring!

hugs

balaji

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I'm happy with my coffee

Its been more than a month and no new posts!well it does worry me too. i m afraid i m losing this interest to the new addiction to facebook. its more than a social networkin place and i m lovin every fb moment. well..exams could be another good excuse but i wanna be truthful to myself if not to you folks...for i ve always used this space for spillin out all my thoughts. something that could release a lot of pent up emotions. i had to check out my first post to find out when i started blogging.(i m not a diary person u knw).beleive me guys!its been more then 2 yrs and i ve loved every minute here as much as i love fb now!!

What made me blog today was the frivolous attitude of the govt. exactly a year back, the city of mumbai was under attack and justice not yet delivered. quoting a recent tweet, when a new movie opens up in theaters, there is almost 70% turnout...but only 40% for voting...what have we learnt?very true, there is a problem with the system and also with us. we arent concerned about the world around us. life has seem to ve lost value in this busy world of stocks and numbers and politics and entertainment. this means to me a failure of an entire generation. you have understood life the very wrong way.failure to produce good leaders, failure to produce concerned citizens and failure to sustain harmony and peace. species getting extinct. men getting killed. is this the world we live in? i have lost full faith in the judiciary system of my country..a system that hasnt yet tried the 26/11 attacker...not long frm now,our pockets may go a bit more heavy carryin guns for protection. bullets sold at cash and carry. try it and if you are not satisfied, we ll give you a full refund!

Meanwhile..the younger generation is too busy apeing the west. they think its good to be 'kewl' than cool.suddenly the whole world looks foolish.there is profanity in speeches, obscenity in films and lack of intelligence among people. if this what testifies modern development, i wud be more then happy being under developed. i m so very angry that one could spot indotherms out of me.the men are becomin increasingly boring.the women worse.my only respite these days is my cup of coffee and my pc. its much better spending time with this pal who cant understand more than binary than with my look-alike creatures who are way too stupid.

Btw..its nice to be bak blogging..though i ve not got huge followers for my blog or too much comments pouring in for any post, i ve loved the journey till this very moment and i hope to continue this.....but much like the "tree falling in the forest" riddle..i dunno if my blog ever exists.oh cmon!11:44 is not the time for metaphysics.

facebook:what's on your mind?
haha!many things :)

A SALUTE TO THE MARTYRS OF 26/11
hugs
balaji

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to where i belong?

Roads that prove tough for a sedan, lush greenery all over, deserted streets, the huge and the not-so-huge rivers, friendly ppl, temples frequented by foreigners and a slow life..who says villages suck?

its this 3 day tour i jus finished visiting my native place and so many temples. my recent visit seems to ve jus watered my plant of interest towards our culture. its this "tough to pick up word" kinda feeling u get when u visit ur ancestral places sometimes wondering these really are ur valuable assets. you realize you are here because of them.i dunno whether a joke at this place would be appropriate but then i m a very frank writer and leave reading to ur choice. [[[yeah...the joke..in one of the conversation between a father and son while dicsussing computers...the dad explains"son..the undo button on the toolbar can be used to remove the effect of your last change..in the sense it ll give u back what you had before.."...the son says"hmm...so if there was an undo button in your life...i wouldnt be exactly standing here"]]]. coming back to the ancestry thing..gosh!the ancestry thing??ridiculous:)..its not very often you get to experience such contrasting environments...something city life cant jus cater to. i ve mentioned a lot abt temples in my previous posts and havent received a single comment!!so i ll take it as a excuse to avoid giving my temple experience...write something abt obama..and comments pour in!!crazy world:)well that again is ur choice.talking about choices, i wanna bring about one of the convos i had during the journey especially during times when u are bored watching out the so many mountains on the freeway and one looks no different than the other or the times when your ipod playlist restarts..i had this question for my uncle..given an option to stay either in the village or the city...whr would u live??he was quick enuf to choose the former. the same question was put back to me..this "and u?" act is so common in discussions especially when u don have a question of ur own but are still interested in keepin the convo ticking!!i couldnt reply quick.to be honest..i still havent!!coz i m thinking and too much thinking can strain ur neurons..so i take breaks occasionally by surfing the net..that doenst question my intelligence..jus that it isnt such an easy question after all.you ask me pratibha patil or obama and quick would be my reply.

hmm..yeah the tour again...was really memorable and amazing. whenever i talk about my past or ancestry, i pop up this saying from the back of my cerebrum..how is your ancestry important in ur life?? you life is like a potato plant..the best part of which is underground!!...definitely yes,your past is very important...so is ur present and ofcorse ur future..so wht happened to the question that was put to me?hmm...village life is definitely poetic and looks great.but you knw what??..the first thing i did when i was back home was switch on my pc:)

later that evening, i crossed a high traffic lane, i inhaled more pollution..i found not so friendly people, i heard the big honks and gazed at the huge movie posters..u may have your own views...but city life seems much better..i m looking out of the window now..its raining nice here..shall ask for a hot cup of chai now..hope u enjoyed reading this post as i leave to enjoy my tea.

i belong here,
balaji

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the 9 km ride---trrrr,fumes and thoughts

it was 6.45 am.my distance-traveled meter read 10073.

i kickstarted my drive(the real meaning of the word) and within seconds,i was on the roads of a country thats celebrating 62 yrs of freedom today.i dunno why,but i ve never felt so happy riding my scooter as much i felt this morning.the climate too did all it could to make things more pleasant.as the wheels rolled front,my thoughts rolled back to the times when our country was ruled by the british.

the injustice and torture done to us were perhaps the worst acts of human nature.we had seen the worst.yet,we won our freedom through non violence.such a great nation this is.i pay my respects to millions of ppl who sacrificed their lives for the country.the britishers showed us the worst of human nature and we replied in the best of india.i salute those souls for they gave their lives to ensure a free india tmrw.

man doesnt know wht happens to him after death.we ve all grown up listening to stories of spirits and i hope if those great souls are here somewhr...all i want to tell them is that we are now a great nation.a nation with a great blend of colors,religion,languages,cultured,cuisines and yet united.a nation that has produced great scientists and engineers and doctors and wht not.a nation with jubliant youngsters who are hungry to achieve things,a nation which has embraced cultures frm across the world and a nation that respects and values its past.we are now a nation with one of the largest cellular subscribers,we are a nation which has a fantastic film industry...we ve achieved many things and are still growing.

as the tricolor was hoisted,i felt goosebumps.the national anthem was sung.i was moved.i climbed on my bike bak and set home.i am so proud to be an indian.i respect my identity.i value my heritage.i cherish my culture.if there is something called rebirth,my only wish is to be born again in this great land!!

it was 9.00.my distance-traveled meter read 10082.

hugs
balaji

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my poetic side exposed!!!

dunn wanna fill this post with crap.jus a plain poem.
read thru and lemme know.


It’s a gifted child they said
And looks of more me than you
Oh father!you ve finally answered
We are among a blessed few.

Hes born in the month of December
As the world is filled with joys
He ll make history in this planet,said they
But fate had a different choice

It was white all around for them
But grey it was for him
Oh my god..whts wrong
The priest said you ve sinned.

Twas winter
And spring looked really far behind
He was a cute litlle fella
Jus that he was blind

He couldn’t go to school
As Irwin and as eve
He could all but feel
But not see his parents grieve.

They cursed the lord they praised
why are you so injust?i ve done nothing harm.
Don talk to him like that said the lad
For I can still hear and speak the psalm.

Mamma! A competition I heard is in town
That of a spelling bee
I think I can give it a shot
Thers nothing they want you to see

Ofcorse!you ll win said mom
But his dad thought the claims were tall
I know I cant see the colors
But who said I cant spell them all?

He participated and he even won
He won the hearts and the prize
On given the mike said he
Thank you god!i dunno if I cud ve done this
if he’d given me those eyes.

But then a request he made
I want you to donate thy eyes
For I want to see that lord
Who made me get this prize!

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hey....how do i look?

ahem...the new me is 1 day old.my master decided to gimme a complete makeover ystrday.i havent been liking my previous avatar u knw....the black backgrounds,the pic of my master(he sux!!sshh).my master finished off his exams ystrday and he seemed to be so really releived that he stayed up till minutes after midnite to dress me up.after all..i like u human folks too, need change.but i shud tell you this.

i ve been genuine and loyal to him than any of you guys.he has filled me with almost everything sometimes crap but sometimes real good posts.i ve jus accepted them without a single objection.not too often ve i showed up"bad server" msg to stop him frm uploading thigs which i thought werent dat good.so hes finally done justice.and here i am.my colleagues say i look decent.(guess wht..ms.wordpress says i'm hot!!).

i knw u are in love with my new avatar too.mail me ur comments.guess my inbox is already overflowing.cant really help it.its a mad mad world!!.
so when the site traffic increases,you knw why.but balaji mite think its becoz of his posts.poor fella!!
oh shit!i can hear someone coming in.i think its him.he doesnt knw i m doing this.

i m not going to sign off by "hugs" like how he does.i hate touching human folks.
so its jus a quick bye

http://csayeebalaji.blogspot.com

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hot,hotter,hottest

omg!!this is one of the tuffest times to pass in chennai.with the mercury touching all time highs,you can do nothing but endorse the "stay indoors" campaign.and yes,talking about campaigning,the general elections are round the corner and its time for us to vote.

i m 19.and yes i wanna vote.but unfortunately,i dun have my name in the voters list.this keeps me away from the booths on may 13th.but if someone asks,i can always say that none of the candidates interest me!!the customary excuse thats been passed on to us hereditary.

but i guess everyone should come out and vote.voting is one of the most beautiful gifts of democracy which helps us decide whom we want to lead us.but then,most of us take the election day as a good holiday.and with the temp rising,i m a bit skeptical about the turnout this yr.the other thing thats happening this summer is IPL.some great cricket action for the country that lives cricket,though i personally believe that it wud ve been better if it was conducted in india.they moved it to south africa for security reasons.arey yaar...its election time and the politicians are busy with the elections...so thers no reason to worry(no pun intended).

ah yes,coming bak to the summer,i m trying hard to stick on to the "beat the heat" column suggestions in the daily.going for less black n more white for some time.tried even sticking my head into the fridge once.its bloody 40+ here dude.

i hate anything that goes above 40.(ipl is actually my brainchild)...hey wait....excuse me dad!...whts ur age???

le personnel type de wearie clotha lessier
(the person whos typing with less clothes on)

balaji
(now what language was dat!!!!)

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these times make me think...

when you are sulking around for a coupla days or more,you know that thngs arent going the rite way.but then,thats what coll life is all abt they say.i m smart enuf to knw that college is all not abt bunking classes,the party times,girlfriends or bikes.i m not the guy who gets cross on silly things and never i allow petite matters to spoil my day.

its been a good journey so far.the very first day of coll was very special.as such,first is always special.be it the first place in sports,academics or anything,its got a different feeling.all i hoped for on that first day was 4 good years which when remembered long after would bring a smile on my face.i ve relished the time spent so far,thanks to the company of some great friends.

life is full of crests and troughs.but its some strange periods such as the one i m going thru now that makes you feel boring.days ve been tuff for some while and today was no exception.today was the kind of day where you start with a great morning and draw a sulky face towards the evening.teachers play a great role in a students life.they are the ppl whom u admire and look forward to.but little do they realize they have such a beautiful responsibility..building tomorrow's citizens.good teachers is history.what we have in schools and coll are jus ppl who teach some things they know to others who dont and they charge a fee for that.service?u mus be crazy!!!!!!.

i dun expect them to be model teachers but atleast they can be sensible and a bit responsible.but thanks to some teachers void of all that,my day today was spoilt.a case taht may ve been dealt in a smooth manner was blown out of proportion and i bear the brunt.now all f them seem to ve a grudge on me.but as i said,these things little bother me.for they are just troughs in between crests of happiness and joy and the company of beautiful friends. and when i m going thru troughs,i knw that the crest is sumwhr round the corner.

when i leave this campus 2 yrs later,i m gonna carry a heap of memories..some sweet and some that make u sad...some that make you laugh and some cry.but they are memories.and they always remain sweet.when i recollect these days later,when me and all my classmates wud ve been settled in what they call "life"...the emotions would overflow.tears wud roll down the cheeks and i d jus smile at my son and tell him"your dad is blessed with great friends".

i m feeling much better now and i think i ve already lost that cross feeling.
when winters come,can spring be left far behind???


hugs
balaji

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this and that---ASK'AR' and beyond

a little while ago,i switched on the tv to find out about the oscars.yes,slumdog has finally made it and rahman,gulzar and pookutty have won the awards too for their work on music.now i have every reason to cherish or thats what most of u think or i may ve wanted to do too.no doubt,thers so much pride in me that an indian has finally got to hold something that until today remained an unlikely thing.but on the other hand,you are made to think whether the recognition that we are busy celebrating is truly an honor the indian film fraternity and we indians at large.

i am in no way underestimating the genius in rahman,gulzar and pookutty but something tells me that the western audience isnt still fancy about accepting indian style of music and cinema and we shudnt be crazy about making them accept.they ll never accept it anyway.if they do,then they arent distinguishing themselves from the art styles of a third world country which me and you are a part of.had it been an indian director for the same movie,its tough to say if the story wud ve been same.you never know.

i ve always believed cinema is geo-specific.i.e.cinema should always reflect the cultural identity of the local people.there has to be things that they can relate with easily.we ve grown up listening to songs and they still remain the dominating factor in all public functions.rahman himself has given birth to scores of wonderful music.we have witnessed it and they still keep ringing in our ears.the western world has always laughed at us criticizing our cinema.they say"oh indian movie??is it like 8 hrs with a dozen songs and dancing around trees and stuff?"

taare zameen par to me was a much better film than slumdog millionaire.tzp brought about a change in parenting across the nation and showed dyslexic children in a new light.that may not necessarily fancy western audiences.bcoz the film was based on indian parents and their attitude towards their children.indian parents want nothing less than 1st place for their kid.i wonder where the country would go if all fight for that 1st place.

i m reminded of a joke that was a part of a stand up comedy show in london.crewberry is a dull girl.an american teacher asks her"what is 2+3,little kid?".she replies"hmm....i think...i think...tis RED".the american teacher says"oh my god!!that was not what i was expecting.but i should tell you this.you have a very good creative mind!!!".the same girl goes to an indian teacher and all she gets for her answer is a slap!!.jokes apart.now lets be straight.we are not like them and thats the reason we could easily relate to tzp.pookutty himself feels that his work for SM was not his best.he liked his work for the movie"gandhi,my father".

a movie on gay rights may not be appreciated in india but may be doing good somewhere else.all this means...there are loads and loads of better movies and music that may havent gone to the oscars but are definitely more sensible to the indian audience.i want to say about naan kadavul,a movie which i saw last week.a terrific movie with such a heavy concept and songs that make you cry.it was about a life of an aghori and also threw light upon the dirty beggar mafia that runs in this country.an incredible movie.

this country which we beleive is soon going to overthrow developed countries,movies like this jus pinch us reminding we have a long way to go to make this great country which we both love a better place to live.let us learn to accept and applaud realistic movies.let us all change.yes we can(see again...we need an american to tell us this!!)

congrats to rahman,gulzar and pookutty

balaji

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whats in a name!!

if you ve been seeing the toyota camry advt on the TV or seen the harry potter movies,you might just understand wht this thing is all abt.i m talking abt anagrams.

for those of u who are terminologically challenged,anagrams are nothing but wht u get by rearranging the alphabets of a given word so as to get an entirely new word or a phrase.for eg. "camry" anagrams to "my car".in the harry potter movie,the name tom marvolo riddle changes to "my name is voldemort" with the swish of a wand..

i jus happened to bounce on this website called anagramgenius.it has an anagram generator and gives really interesting anagrams to ur word.i filled the text box with all known names and found it really amazing.

type george bush and it anagrams to"o,he buggers".
osama bin laden is "a damn alien S.O.B".
saddam hussein is "UN's said he's mad.".
statue of liberty is "built to stay free".
albert einstein is "ten elite brains".
and "William Shakespeare" anagrams to "I am a weakish speller"??!
beleive it or not,sachin tendulkar anagrams to"and i lack the runs"!!!.
i tried princess diana and it said "ascend in paris".

it is very interesting to get really funny descriptions to ur name.anagram is not all that junk stuff..not many of us know that the city kyoto located in japan is actually an anagram of tokyo!!.so jus give it a try.its worth it.

now,obey dog!(good bye)

rgds
ease by a jail(sayee balaji)

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mumbai meri jaan

i took a break from my routine life in chennai and visited mumbai,the place which of late is being identified with terror but is still the good old childhood place for me.

its been close to 4 yrs i havent been to b'bay.i had a long pending visit and i decided to jus make it this time.after getting down at the chatrapatti shivaji airport,i was a bit careful.there were a chain of auto rickshaws just outside the arrival terminal but my experience here in chennai made me skeptical.so i jus called up my frnd and asked him if it wud be good to trust those guys arnd.after all these fone calls and stuffs,i jus got into an auto and told him"uncle!!mujhe thakur village jana hain".and that was it then.i was into the roads of mumbai.

dunno wht,but this city has got a charm that u cant find newhere else.i have lived for some good amt of time in both these cities ...so u can actually trust wht i m saying.thakur village is the place whr my frnd is put up.the school which i attended was in place called thakur copmplex which is jus like opp thakur village.as it was early hours in the morning,traffic wasnt that much a problem.so i could get a fair glimpse of this city.those frequent movement of my eye balls to the meter in the rickshaw can well suggest how bad auto experience in chennai was.

the place looked not exactly as it was 4yrs ago.there were some changes...or perhaps i had jus forgotten everything.i somehow managed my way into the thakur village and there i was.as this was my first outing alone,every succesful thing i did was a great morale booster for me.yes!!found my way frm the airport to my frnds house.the weather was pleasing.was as if it was welcoming someone returning home after a long time.rang the doorbell.and i met my frnd there.it felt soo great.very nice you know.i jus refreshed myself and we started calling up our frnds to find out when we can possibly meet them.as it was a very short trip i had planned,i wanted to make sure i'd visit everyone if possible.

where and when was decided and at abt 11.00 we were at the coffee shop.met a good old frnd of mine.we shared and talked abt so many things over the coffee.a lot of interesting things came up.recollecting memories of the past,talking abt our present and curious abt our future was wht we did until there wasn nothing left that could come up the straw.my frnd had actually bunked his coll and was speaking abt wht fun it is in doing that.i felt out of the group for that few minutes.u knw wht i m talking abt!!we jus roamed abt the place for some time and decided to get back home.we decide to spend the evening watching a good movie.mumbai was stung by the ghajini mania and so we thgt we could give it a watch.it was a good movie.we returned home for dinner.menu was punjabi.and i liked it very much.my frnds mom cooks really well.all the 3 days i stayed there,i retired very late in the nite....past midnite.so thats something very different for me.i m bascially the "early to bed,early to rise" fella.

later that nite,we went down and had some sweet pan.that was the perfect way to end the day.next morning was sunday and i was soo geared up for i was to meet some more frnds that day.i did.and it was amazingly awesome.beleive me,i had some really great times out there.after coming to chennai,i wasnt able to keep in touch wid all my classmates in mumbai.i did meet a few of my frnds whom i m speaking to, literally after 4 yrs.how gr8 it was.cheers!!.with frnds arnd,time really flies.and how true it was.it was late noon when we said bye,take care,good luck and stuffs.i cudnt waste ne single second.coz i had plans for going to town i.e churchgate for shopping and jus walk along the beautiful marine drive and also look at the taj.

we went to borivali and boarded a churchgate fast.there are very few places which actually stick to the description they give and mumbai is one of them.so a churchgate fast is really fast.local trains are the lifeline of the city and all u cud afford in one of these trains is 1 sq.ft of luxury.but since it was a sunday,it wasnt that crowded.i travelled all along the distance hanging near the edge of the train compartment.it was great.an amazing experience.got down at churchgate.walked outside and straight to the fashion street which is the shopping hub and u can find everything frm safety pins to platinum.i got something which i found interesting.i still hadnt eaten a wada-pav which remains the best street food in the city and something i crave for very much.i finally got my hands on one of them.every single bite i had,the wow was getting even more louder and expressive.we then went to marine drive and jus sat thr for some while looking at the endless sea."before we turn poets,lets go"i said.

we clicked a few pics and headed straight to the taj.the gateway was under renovation and the immediate area outside the taj was cordoned.took some pics here too.walked all the way back to th churchgate station.on the way i found i good tee and i got that.it said"i love mumbai".i knew i had to get one for me.after buying all this,we head back to the station and catch a borivali fast.the story of hanging near the edge still continued.

the beautiful breeze hit me with some interesting thoughts..how active the city is..how vibrant the place looks.its definitely got something which is not there newhere else.we down got at the borivali station and i had some more wada-pavs.i knew i wudnt get them here in chennai.so i wanted to have till i get sick of them.by the time v reached home,it was 9.00...i wanted to meet another good frnd of mine.so i went up to his place.he stays pretty close to he school i was in.so we just thgt we'd visit the school campus too.the school looked same except for some minor changes.but it still rocked as a campus.talking abt loads of things,we were jus strolling arnd...we then headed to a kulfi parlour and i had some great kesar pista kulfis.there were simply the best.thers one more thing called dabelis which u get there and are something i used to live upon during my days in that city.so i jus asked my frnd if i cud find one in that locality.his yes made me reallly happy....some sort of feeling which u get after u r done wid ur checklist or something.i had those mouth watering dabelis followed by pani puris and dahi papdi.

i knw whts going thru ur mind.u mus be finding me a real foodie.cmon,mumbai street food will provide neone a great gastronomical journey.i had soo much that the proportion of 70% water and the rest food wud ve swapped places.we then found a park nearby and sat there talking and talking and talking.i was past midnite then."bye bye" followed and i went back home.i never really expected the sunday to go this rocking.thnx to evryone who gave me such a beautiful experience.monday morning was like different.my flight was at 11.00.so i had to start by 9.00.so all my time today morning was spent in packing and stuffs.it was truly a great experience for me.something i never expected.something that has made me feel really different and great.

be it the autowalllas,the stay at my frnds place,the trip to south mumbai,meeting all my frnds......everything was soo soo amazing and fantastic.i cudnt have asked for more.my frnd dropped me at the airport.i hugged him.i called up all my frnds to say goodbye.it was a trip of a kind.i m fortunate to have some great frnds up there.hope the coming times will only strengthen our relationship.as for the city,its the city.i'd nevr love any place more than this.its got the charm.its got the atmosphere.mumbai rocks.please god!!i sincerely pray to you.please dont let this city suffer any more attacks or disasters.this is such a great place,a place where there is life everywhere everytime.

this trip has only increased my love for this city and i hope to see her back soon.before i get all emotional,i ll quickly say

hugs
balaji

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shaken,grieved...she lives on

during the days when i wished to have my own blog...i used to think on wht could i possibly feed it with.writing abt things that usually fascinate me or some of my own experiences thats worth sharing was what i thgt could find a place in my blog.its now over a year or so and i guess i ve done justice to my own expectations or ideas.i would ve definitely not wished to write abt an incident that has left many people arnd the world baffled.but as always circumstances forces me to.
60 hrs of anxiety,loss of many innocent lives and loss of some of our finest cops was all it took for us to realise that our county isnt safe any more and that our leaders have all made a big fool of us.....or have we??....i was just among a billion more who were glued to our tv sets watching the entire operation...with sinking hearts and praying lips.with the death toll rising it was all but clear that our leaders have failed and have failed terribly.this case might have not got the international attention it has now received if it wasnt the foreigners who were among the ones held hostage.because in India,life is cheap.its just after all a very negligible reduction to our 1 billion strong population.the politicians still have a huge herd of fools left.at this time of crisis,its natural for us to feel insecure but the important point is when will we ever have to get rid of this insecurity blanket?.our politicians could have atleast made up the post terror period interesting with the blame game and fake resignation dramas.we ve had enuf of it.
mr.politician i sincerely hope that you dont get to see your loved one putting it up with one of those terrorists who is indiscriminately firing on hundreds of innocent people and could end up his life anytime.
mr politician i also hope that you dont get to hear your telephone ringing and understand what it is to be in that span of a minute.
mr.politician i also hope that you may not get to see your son being wrapped up in the tricolor.
mr. politician i sincerely wish that your house is not flanked by politicians with the media people to insult you by paying a ransom of a lakh rupees.
you are very queer folks indeed.folks who know nothing but money.there is life outside currencies mr.politician.you are the chosen one.we have chosen you to lead us and not bleed us.and i want to tell this to u mr.politiican...no one will turn away from the major's house coz none of your sons have even 1% of the patriotism,courage and commitment that this 30 yr old great chap has shown.he has stood in the front not wondering about his life,his dreams,his family or his fav.actors movie which he mite ve planned to go that weekend.he just thought he should save many innocent lives mr.politician.he just thought he shud be there doing his job.you reward people who shoot in olympic games with the ultimate luxuries of life.and wht ve u done to take care of these men who are actually shooting terrorists who mite have thgt of shooting one of your dear ones??.mr.raj thacekray,i am sorry but i would like to tell u that it were not the marathis alone in the nsg who were fighting these terrorists but in fact "indians" or "outsiders" as you may better know.maybe you were counting the no of marathi commandos involved in the operation but we were counting the no of dead indians and offering sympathies to their loved ones.
i dont actually want to say this again.people would have told this far more eloquently that what i am equipped to.but yes...we ve had enuf.we need actions and not words.we need leaders.we need peace.with attacks likes these my hope of a developed india seems nothing more than a fairy tale to me.will my children get to enjoy living in a land which people like mahatma gandhi,subash chandra bose,tilak and many others sacrificed their lives for??as for mumbai...you shake her,you destroy her...yet she lives on.and i love her.

faith

balaji

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